About Dr. Aazort

Dr. Toffet Aazort is an Artaxian from the far side of Earth’s Local Group of galaxies, specifically, using Earth nomenclature, the “pinwheel” spiral Triangulum Galaxy (Messier Object 33). Triangulum is one of only three spirals in our Local Group of about 40. The local star system for Artaxia is located in the “northeast” corner of Triangulum. (Hi, Mom!)

Doctor Aazort is a professor at the Multiversity of Artaxia which for over four thousand local years has sponsored his ongoing contributions to the Everything Earth (“EE”) reference, now in its 35th volume. His notes here serve both as first draft addendums to EE as well as discussion points for his popular Advanced Earth Studies Group. His film reviews are a personal specialty, picked up from his work with famous Earth specialist Dr. Spode Hardratt.

Exactly how long and how often Dr. Aazort has visited and technical matters like transport and communications are all classified. He is also limited as to how much he can reveal about his home planet or the pan-galactic Federated System to which it belongs.

Since Earth is currently controlled by an “incipient” species, the planet remains under the System’s contact embargo (apart from the usual scofflaws and pranksters making unauthorized visits – you know who you are). For the purposes of the embargo, an “incipient” species is one that, regardless of its material or scientific advancements, has yet to cross the spiritual/technological line known as “the self-extinction divide.”

Suffice to say, Dr. Aazort has observed Earth and homo sapiens for a long, long time. (Artaxians are mortal, but enjoy extreme longevity.) The purpose, basic to all Artaxian extra-planetary study, is to follow the development of any species theoretically intelligent enough to cross the self-extinction divide and eventually resolve the problem of interstellar travel. It’s the job of Dr. Aazort and his colleagues in preparing references like EE and holding their various seminars, to make sure human existence, for whatever period, is documented and that any interstellar travel is anticipated. (Old Artaxian Scout motto: “Be primed!”)

Permissible points of interest:

Physiologically, Artaxians, like most heavy gravity beings, are bipedal and subscribe to the typical systems of duality that biological evolution everywhere seems to favor: stereo vision, hearing, etc. As such, masquerading as a primate isn’t much of a stretch.

The Artaxians use Federated System currency known as “System Credits,” with an “income” floor below which no citizen is allowed to sink. This would amount to $50,000 US dollars per local year, translating roughly to Cr.1025.